A comment left on my teaching in Thailand post had me thinking about this little travel bubble of ours we exist in that shows us a beautiful world and life filled with joy, love, peace and happiness.
You go from country to country becoming more enamoured with this beautiful thing called life, the magic it holds, and the inspiring people that join you along your journey.
You return home with grandiose thoughts of how the world can really be and how you can help be this person who changes the world to be bigger and better.
Bursting the bubble
Sooner or later, reality comes crashing in and bursts your bubble to show you the truth.
Real life is fraught with problems, stresses, arguments and unhappiness.
That’s right it is a cyncical world. And I turn that way when I join it.
Fleeting Travel Moments of Only the Best Sides
The reason we don’t witness this when we travel is we only spend fleeting moments in the places we visit and in our encounters with people along the away. We see people in their best possible light.
When you meet a stranger for the first time, you are most likely to show them your best side.
When you travel you rarely get to know a person beyond this. You don’t have time to get too know their foibles, idiosyncrasies and negative outlooks on the world, and they yours. You see them shining with happiness, laughing at the joys experienced on the road and their transformative souls bursting with goodness.
Goodness that can quickly be wiped out upon return to “reality.”
Not only do I see the goodness of people, but the simplicity that comes with living a life free from society.
For me I hate reality. I hate living the normal day grind and getting trapped in my own misery and those around me. I hate becoming concerned with idiotic politicians and their baseless promises and policies that destroy our environment, bring about war, hatred and division and make our lives just that little more difficult.
I’m tired of thinking that we can improve society and that somehow I can make a difference. I tired of being surrounded by problems, by negativity, fear, insecurity, bitchiness, gossip and drama.
And the even sadder reality is that I find myself becoming more like this too. I get sucked into the grind and because I am not doing what I love I also become cynical, bitter, upset and not my best self. I do not like who I become.
It makes me want to run . Run fast and far and never return.
My post on teaching in Thailand was all fairies and nice about what I learned due to the students respecting books. I was only there teaching for six months so this is definitely what I noticed. I wasn’t there long enough to see all the problems that come with a Thai education. Well I did, but because my time was short I was able to leave with just the joys fresh in my mind.
Of course the problems are there. I am just stuck in my delusional travel bubble where everything is great, and teaches me a lesson and helps me to love the world more. This is not how it really is for those who live in that world every day.
I remember always saying about my time in London. “It was fantastic, but I should have left after six months instead of staying for an extra two years.” And that was because those extra two years burst my bubble.
It put me into the space of reality, and problems came flooding in. Problems that cost me dearly.
A Perpetual Nomad
My mind grapples with the idea of “Am I going to be perpetually running? Has my life of travels made me want to remove myself from the real world for good?”
I had a conversation with friend recently. He was telling me how he was tired of all the people he seems to encounter who are just concerned with themselves. “I thought it was just here,” he said. “But my wife came home the other night and said the same thing.”
“That is why I travel so much,” ” I replied. “I can’t stand coming back to society. Give me six months and then I want to run again. I hate it. All I see around me are dramas and unhappy people when I return to the real world, and I become like that too. For me I have to deal with the other side to that which means I am a perpetual nomad.”
“Well that is the problem isn’t it? You can leave it but when you have kids…..
“Yeah, but for me, I am used to it, I don’t think it’s a problem for my kids.”
“Hmmm.”
I don’t care if it means I will be a nomad for the rest of my life. I would rather live in my travel bubble world, where the world is perfect, people are kind, gentle and loving and everyone has the aim to live in peace.
It is a false sense of reality, but it is my reality, and it is a reality that brings me peace and joy.
And this is the only purpose to my life, so I choose to run to it.
